Dear Indian Society,
We have a problem. You see, although there are many upsides to our culture, one of the downsides is that we have a hard time talking about sensitive issues. We think it's important to pretend everything's perfect and if it isn't, then we just blame it on the person with the least power (usually the woman). This is because our reputation is the most important. We think if everyone just followed THE RULES of Indian morals/values, then nothing bad would happen.
We are especially uncomfortable when talking about how womens' bodies are controlled and used. To many people, a woman's body itself is an unclean thing. Many people don't know how to deal with it, or think about it since it is seen as inherently sexual, and therefore something both to be wanted and hated. Everything that comes out of it is bad, and the best way to handle a woman's body (if you were unfortunate enough to be born with the body of a woman) is to not think about it at all and let your husband handle it.
But enough. These are some reasons why I want to make you uncomfortable with my body.
1. The real pain of children, women, and men being raped, and the perpetrators getting away with it because it is "bad" and "shameful" and "dirty" to talk about is more important to me than your being uncomfortable.
Keeping children
Because of your comfort, children don't have words to describe their sexual assault or rape. I want to give them the words to describe "good touch" and "bad touch" and what parts of their body are. I want to make you uncomfortable.
Because of your comfort, even if children do know what is happening to them, they hide it. They think their bodies become dirty. They feel fear, guilt and shame. I want them to know it is not their fault. I want to make you uncomfortable.
Because of your comfort, families hide and shush and quiet sexual assault and rape. They "keep it in the family". They tell victims to "forgive". Their reputation and image is more important than the victims. I want to make you uncomfortable.
Because of your comfort, some women don't know what sex is until their wedding night. Forget even talking about pleasure or consent. I want them to know about their bodies, learn to enjoy their bodies and be respected. I want to make you uncomfortable.
Because of your comfort, marital rape is still legal in India because the fact a man can go long periods inside a marriage (which is the only place sex is socially approved) is seen as barbaric. I want a woman's "marital duty" to be abolished. I want to make you uncomfortable.
Because of your comfort, I lose my "honor" when I'm raped or sexually assaulted. The blame gets placed on me. Last time I checked, my honor does not reside in my vagina. I want to make you uncomfortable.
Because of your comfort, I lose my morality when I lose my virginity (outside of a socially accepted marriage of course). My morality has nothing to do with my sexuality because the critical thinking skills needed to make decisions between good and bad choices reside in my brain, not my vagina. I want to make you uncomfortable.
Because of your comfort, society still accepts a rapist and considers the rape as a "mistake" if the perpetrator is rich or powerful enough. I want that to be considered unacceptable. I want to make you uncomfortable.
Because of your comfort, the medically correct and objective term for my genitals is censored and taboo, while similar words such as "pussy" and "chutiya" are used for insults and thrown around freely.
I hope there comes a point when you are comfortable with being uncomfortable.
Sincerely,
Me
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Please keep it classy!